Lights. Camera. Awkward!

Observation #27: The camera adds 10 pounds...of awkwardness

I cannot take a serious picture. Its impossible for me to take a normal smiling picture without feeling/looking awkward. As my mother so wisely put it after I would give her each of my school pictures, "why can't you ever just take one decent picture?" Well mother, I have finally found an answer to your question: unless, for some reason, I feel really hott that day, my picture is gonna turn out like this:

or this:

or this:

or who could forget this:

(surprise! orchestra picture)

You may all be confused and a little disturbed by this blast from the past, but the truth is, I haven't changed at all. Is the past still the past if it is identical to your present?

Anyways, this is a very long and embarrassing explanation for the reason for my attempt as a fashion blogger. 

I have been thrifting and sewing my own clothes since I cared about fashion (so like 7th grade?), and I've finally decided to share something I have thrifted/altered. But my attempt at a serious picture didn't turn out too well, so you get this instead:

I found this brilliant moo moo at a thrift store. In its former life it was an XXL shapeless dress, but I saw it's potential as soon as the tribal pattern and I locked eyes. So I took it home, and after a couple hours of clothing therapy with the sewing machine, it became a flattering shirt and skirt that I can't get enough of. I also bought the tribal necklace I am wearing (if you can see it) at the same thrift store and I wear it like my own skin. 

Save Money, Die awkwardly, Walmart.

Observation #9: My awkwarditis is still raging

This picture of Brad and I is one of my normal moments

For those of you who know me or have read previous posts you know about my High School awkwardness. Well I can't say "High School awkwardness" since I am still awkward, but there is something about the same insecure people seeing me in my insecurity that just really compliments my already awkwardness. Well, body and soul were reunited again as this HS awkwardness came back with seeing my HS crush.

I have actually crushed on boy since he moved into my ward in 5th grade, but not until sophomore year did I realize how truly perfect we would be together. Unfortunately, boy didn't have this same revelation... That was the start of our unbalanced relationship.

I haven't seen boy since I left for BYUI and I had completely forgotten him and our should-be-relationship until I ran into him at Walmart. Now if this were a Nicholas Sparks book we would realize what we had been missing all these years, run away together, and then I would be diagnosed with some incurrable disease. But since I wasn't aware that my Nicholas Sparks moment would be that day, I decided not to get ready before I left for my Walmart adventure. As I walked into Walmart I saw boy walking my way and I wished that my hair would blow back in slow motion and we'd make sexy eye-contact. Now although the wind was definitley blowing, my hair was too greasy to move and I made sure we didn't make eye contact but he obviously didn't notice my "piss off" expression because he walked right up to me and started talking about his mission coming up or something like that... it was all drowned out by the sound of my self esteem flushing down the toilet. After a few minutes of this, mom finally shows up and we go our separate ways. As soon as we got our cart and walked the other way, I turned to my mom and told her how mad I was that she allowed me to look like that in public. But her supermom sensitivity just said "you didn't want him to see you like that." We then discussed how I have crushed on him since forever and now he'll be going on a mission and remembering me like that. I then felt someone looking at me so I glanced behind and saw boy 7 feet away. I guess he wasn't leaving. He now has a red-faced, greasy-haired image of me in his mind to remind him why he never dated me while he serves his two years in California.

Walmart has finally failed me.

No I did not forget to post my thrift finds but I am at work so that post will be for another time

I DO Try Mom...

Observation #4: Harry Potter helps every situation

So it has been almost a month and a half into the Idaho dating world, and still I have no date.
I guess they all got the memo about me being a dork. Or maybe they all just read my blog.
Well whatever the reason may be, I still have no dates to record, but I do have a potential date.
You know your life is pathetic when you blog about potential dates...

Anyways, here's the story:
In my art class this cute boy sat next to me, we talked, he was funny, and he laughed at my jokes! Then, right before class starts, he excuses himself. For the rest of class I awaited his return but was disappointed when all I had of him was his spiral notebook and his pencil. Yes, he just left them sitting open next to me. So I did what anyone would do. I wrote "Captured by Voldemort?" on the blank page. I didn't see him the rest of class but I hoped he wouldn't leave his stuff there so he could see my clever note.
The next week at class I see him, and I know he sees me since I sat 2 rows in front of him. He didn't talk to me...
The week after that he comes and sits next to me. I pretend like I don't see him in case he dubbed me as "the weird harry potter chick," but to my surprise, he starts talking to me. "Are you the one who wrote 'this' in my binder?" He was smiling, and not like a "shes so weird I'm trying to hold back a laugh" smile.
There's no date yet but next week I plan on using my feminine wiles.
Stay tuned and you might actually get a good story.

I Understand The Truth

Observation #2: Fat cheeks are only cute on chipmunks.

No this isn't a post about the largeness of my behind, although I could write a whole blog post and many more about that. All in do time my friends, all in do time. No this is a post about my wisdom showing up and the nice-looking doctor yanking it out. Yes, this is the tale of the wisdom teeth.

You have heard this tale many times, you maybe even have experienced it, but no one can fully understand the truth until it is lived. I understand the truth.

In fact, my cheeks are still trying to recoperate from that truth. If I wasn't so self-concious about my rodent face I would gladly share a most humorous picture that dearest Kaitlyn took (since that is what blogs are about right? No one wants just a bunch of words. No wonder I only have 7 followers... Oh well)but since I am still self-concious, here's a preview:

Tune in next time to see what happens with big cheeks, ADD, and a bed stricken maniac

A Word From the Socially Unacceptable

Yes this is my second post in one week. Who knew working gave you so much more time on the computer? Certainly not my dad. Anyways, if you (whoever you mysterious cyberspace stalker is) have previously read my blog you will know about the pathetic situation I like to call the crush disease. Actually, I'm going to change that to fancy because "crush" sounds like I'm still in high school and I have studied millions of hours and endured just as many unbearable social encounters to earn the title of "graduate," so I'm going to speak like it. So my fancy has taken a more normal turn of events. It has settled upon a long standing friend. Now you might be thinking that this isn't really a normal fancy but comparatively...
So I'm a relatively confident person right? I mean, I haven't been nervous about a boy since junior high. Well, while this guy was on his way to my house, I couldn't stop fidgeting! I went on facebook but just ended up looking him up. I sat down to watch TV with my little brother, but never satisfied, kept switching channels until he kicked me out. I ended up at the piano but my playing was so shaky that I think I discovered piano vibrato. After his said "fifteen minutes" (puh) he showed up and I was a nervous wreck! I ended up acting super cheesy and fake with the whole "I miss you we NEED to hang out" junk. I believe when he commented on what I was wearing I said "hmm noua shaw." It was quite impressive. I think I blew him away. Really though I don't think he's coming back.

Signed: The Spaz

what high school musical doesn't know

I discovered the secret to popularity. Yes I am aware of the fact that that sounded like the opening to High School Musical 4, but I am willing to let myself sound like a 14 -year old to make my point clear. Anyways (your all thinking), I find that when I want to explain something important my mind wanders to everything unimportant making it impossible to get my point across. In fact, my 10th grade english teacher told me... joke. For reals through, the secret to popularity is ..(suspence).. blogging. In high school I was refered to as "the girl with weird clothes," "leslie's friend" or "cameron's sister." The last one was my favorite considering I went to that school for 3 years and he 1. What a confidence booster. But now that I have a blog people know who I am, want to be my friend, chase me down the street! Not quite, but my point is that I'm cool. I know my few friends that are reading this are thinking that this is merely repercussion from all the years of being picked last in dodgeball but I have reason for my thought! In fact, five people this week have informed me that I needed to update my blog. Five! I don't think five people even showed up to my "sweet 16!" Wasn't so sweet... A girl at Jamba Juice even picked me out and told me that she read my blog. I know that when I post this no one will read it and I will go back to "weird clothes girl," but to those few who take sweet time out of their day to read my blog and ease those horrid high school memories; bless you.

I Know Ned. I wish he knew me...

Everyone has something that they don't like about themselves.
Let me rephrase that, every FEMALE has something they don't like about themselves and my "something" that I recently discovered is this; no matter the circumstances or people in my life I always find myself fancying some boy.
Now some may say this is natural, "You're a teenage girl!" But when all the men in my life are on missions or in college, my "fancies," as Ron Weasley would say, have become stranger. At the beginning of this odd stage, the subject of my crushing was this random boy in my class who seemed different from all the typical mountain view boys, so I subconciously dubed him the one. I did all the things you do when you crush on someone- stare at them in class, facebook stalk them, ask your friends about them- okay I did all the things that I do when I crush on someone. Anyways, I never talked to this guy, until today, and oh was it great. HE'S WEIRD! What a relief. So I was finally over with this odd stage, or so I thought. An hour after I get over Mr. Weird, I went to lunch with my three girlfriends, safe, nothing flirty or romantic about Neds. But today Neds must have really turned up the heat for as soon as I walked through the doors, I saw him. Its love.